I suppose in an effort to be down-to-earth we dispense with pretense and make ourselves as approachable and relatable as possible. Nothing wrong with that. That’s even a good thing. But there’s a down-to-earth approach and then there’s a Green-Acres-here-I-come kind of presentation. Don’t misunderstand, I’m not picking on country folk, or anyone less cultured than most. I’m just saying that, when we’re trying to positively influence others, presentation matters.
And as much as we like to think appearances don’t matter, or shouldn’t matter, they do. People usually make several judgments about us before we even open our mouth to say anything. That’s just the reality we live in. And sometimes those judgments are a reflection of reality.
A positive appearance can provide that open door into someone’s life, whereas with a disheveled appearance you may never get the chance. To put it in simpler terms, think about asking someone for financial advice and they drive up to your door in a old rusted out 1978 Ford Pinto station wagon. Would you want to take financial advice from that person? Actually, it could be that he’s just really frugal and secretly a millionaire, but chances are most likely not.
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I believe in our appearance-obsessed culture it’s so easy to be repulsed by it and end up gravitating to the opposite end of the spectrum—thinking appearances shouldn’t matter at all. But being concerned with appearances doesn’t necessarily make you pretentious; it’s when we’re overly concerned with appearances that we run into problems. Think of it this way: Instead of outward appearances trying to present something that’s not there, think of appearances being an extension, or even a reflection of what’s on the inside. That’s when appearances and presentation are honest and pure. The outside and inside are accurately represented.
And appearances can make you feel more confident. If you were giving a speech in front of a large crowd, you’d find it much easier if you were wearing dress clothes than your workout gear you wear to the gym. Your clothing doesn’t just say something to others about you, it says something to yourself about you. You’re giving an affirming voice to who you are. It’s not that outward appearances are to be disregarded; they just aren’t a good thing when they aren’t true to form.
Taking pride in our appearance is OK, as long as we’re not prideful in our appearance. The things we neglect reflect the things we don’t care about. When we show little concern over how we present ourselves, we aren’t reflecting a positive outlook on life. And I understand there are times when life throws challenges at us that would make being concerned with appearances imprudent. But putting some effort into our presentation isn’t a bad thing. And we don’t need to feel bad about looking good.